(This deck review was written and submitted by Gamelen. The
author made Top 2 and Top 8 everytime he used it in MPDC, and it has
inspired many players so thanks to him for sharing his thoughts on it
and contributing to the Clan's blog).
Bad Touch is a
Golgari control deck in Standard Pauper that is based primarily around the
powerful devotion mechanic. It seeks
long games with board stalls while digging for multiple copies of Gray Merchant
of Asphodel to slowly establish control before punching through the final
points of damage.
Preface: Devotion to Black
Like in Mono
Black Control, the latent power Gray Merchant of Asphodel takes center
stage. It stalls the game against
aggressive opponents and can close games out of nowhere. The full potential of devotion only becomes
apparent when two conditions are met:
- The
battlefield is controlled
- The
opponent’s hand is empty (or known)
The first goal is
mostly self-explanatory. Devotion counts
the number of black mana symbols among Bad Touch’s permanents, so naturally the
deck looks to keep a lot of black permanents in play. A balance must be struck between developing
the devotion count and ensuring the game goes long enough to cast Gray Merchant
and Disciple of Phenax at opportune times.
The second goal
of devotion decks is to eliminate answers from its opponent’s hand. Instant speed removal can reduce, or even
eliminate, the devotion count in response to Gray Merchant or Disciple of
Phenax by removing the creature with the ability on the stack. Counter spells negate the power of these
cards outright.
Mono Black
Control fulfills both of these conditions and is one of the most solid decks in
the format. However, with the Ravnica
guildgates still available splashing a second color is quite easy to do and may
well be worth the effort.
Bad Touch
Bad Touch
forsakes maximizing the power of a single Gray Merchant or Disciple of Phenax
for the ability to resolve those creatures more reliably and in multiples.
Creatures
4 Deadly Recluse
3 Corpse Hauler
4 Sluiceway Scorpion
4 Disciple of Phenax
 |
| Stranger Danger |
4 Gray Merchant of Asphodel
Spells
4 Grisly Salvage
3 Altar's Reap
2 Read the Bones
2 March of the Returned
4 Devour Flesh
4 Stab Wound
Lands
8 Forest
10 Swamp
4 Golgari Guildgate
Sideboard
4 Duress
3 Sewer Shambler
3 Naturalize
2 Crypt Incursion
3 Pharika's Cure
Devotion Goals
In order to
accomplish the first or our two devotion goals, we’re running Deadly Recluse
and Sluiceway Scorpion to trade with our opponent’s best attackers while
casting Grisly Salvage and Read the Bones to look for our Merchants and
Disciples. Devotion creatures are better
in multiples and that’s how we’re going to cast them.
We play many
cards that trade better than 1-for-1 to force our opponent’s hand empty. We’re drawing cards at every opportunity,
looking at our opponent’s hand, forcing discards, recurring high impact
creatures, trading up with deathtouch, and scavenging in the late game.
Card Choices - Creatures
4 Deadly Recluse
Recluse blocks and trades with almost anything and only costs 2
mana. It also wears scavenge counters
well and will often trade for multiple blockers in the late game.
3 Corpse Hauler
Hauler recurs Gray Merchants, blocks early when necessary, and beats
for two late game where your opponents don’t want to target it with removal
(making it another surprisingly effective scavenge target).
4 Sluiceway Scorpion
Scorpion attacks and blocks well while still being an unattractive
target for removal. This card is very
flexible and provides extra value from Grisly Salvage.
4 Disciple of Phenax
Disciple might be the best card in the deck. It usually trades 1-for-1 just from the
discard, but it also reveals the opponent’s hand, blocks, and adds to
devotion. It’s not uncommon to cast Gray
Merchant before Disciple of Phenax to prioritize card advantage over life
totals.
4 Gray Merchant of Asphodel
Gray Merchant is the biggest reason to play black. In close games it preserves life while
whittling down the opponent. In winning
positions it ends the game.
Card Choices - Spells
4 Grisly Salvage
Grisly Salvage digs through 5 cards looking for Merchants while putting
scorpions into the graveyard. It also
gives us a way to use the 2 mana we hold up for Altar’s Reap or Devour Flesh
and is an excellent end-of-turn play. Remember
that Grisly Salvage can get lands when the shuffler isn’t cooperating.
3 Altar's Reap
Stab Wound on your Gray Merchant is horrible and can lose you the
game. Bad Touch also likes to recur
creatures from the graveyard and benefits more from sacrificing its creatures
than most other decks.
2 Read the Bones
Long games are won by card advantage and it’s hard to do better than
Read the Bones. There could easily be
more than 2 of these in the deck.
2 March of the Returned
A 2-for-1 that gets exactly the cards you want. Resolving this spell will often win the game,
but also opens you to the graveyard hate that many opponents will sideboard.
4 Devour Flesh
Devour Flesh is one of the cheapest removal spells in the format and
can also get you out of a Stab Wound. Casting
this card early helps mask when you have an Altar’s Reap.
4 Stab Wound
Sometimes Stab Wound forces opponents to remove their own creatures,
but other times it gives your opponent a blocker that you don’t want to attack
into, and still others it gets knocked off by a Gods Willing. I go back and forth on this card. If I can find room for Basilica Screecher it
might stay, otherwise I may replace it with Grisly Spectacle.
Card Choices – Sideboard
The sideboard is by far the least refined part of
this deck. This is merely the sideboard
I ran in MPDC 23.04.
4 Duress
Blue based control decks will counter your important spells and draw
more cards than you can discard. Hitting
their important spells early or before resolving a Disciple of Phenax is
important to maintaining card advantage.
3 Sewer Shambler
Many of the other powerful decks in the format contain swamps and Sewer
Shambler helps break the effective mirror match. The cheap scavenge makes it very flexible.
3 Naturalize
Ethereal Armor is a serious problem, especially with Hopeful
Eidolon. Naturalize may not be the
answer. This choice is untested.
2 Crypt Incursion
Incursion is good in the mirror when countering March of the Returned
and Corpse Hauler and is serviceable against aggressive decks. It has limited use in the Mill match where it
can counter their Crypt Incursions, and is better than running a dead card.
3 Pharika's Cure
Fast aggressive decks and Extort both run many 2 toughness creatures
that can end the game before you’re ready.
The removal is more important than the life gain, but it’s a nice bonus.
Metagame and Matchups: Early Thoughts
This format is
still very young, but there are a few decks that you can expect to see at MPDC. The popular decks that I remember facing are:
- Mono Black Control
- Orzhov Extort
- Selesnya Enchants
- Boros
- Dimir Mill
- Azorius Control
I will attempt
to briefly summarize my thoughts on these matches.
Mono Black Control
This is effectively the mirror
match. Basilica Screecher needs to be
dealt with early before it does too much extort damage. Try to keep their devotion low enough that
you can avoid revealing too much of your hand to Disciple of Phenax. Conversely, cast Disciples to tear apart
their hand and try to keep them top decking so your Grisly Salvages and
scavenge counters can carry the match.
Try to play around their Corpse Haulers and make sure to save Altar’s
Reap for Stab Wound.
Orzhov Extort
Kill anything that has the word
“extort” on it immediately. Those points
add up quickly and are an absolute priority.
Disciple usually comes online quickly enough to pick the last creature
out of their hand.
Selesnya Enchants
Ethereal Armor and Auramancer (for
Ethereal Armor) are the cards that matter.
Deathtouch does a good job at keeping the rest in check.
Boros
The new Boros lists tend to run 30
or more of the most efficient creatures in the format. I don’t believe I’ve played this matchup yet,
but it could be very difficult. Keeping
them off of battalion will make it easier to block which is important since Bad
Touch doesn’t have very many removal spells.
Be careful of getting blown out by Madcap Skills when relying on
blockers.
Dimir Mill
You will lose this match. This is the number one reason not to play Bad
Touch. Mill’s opening hands can be shaky
and punishing them with Duress is important.
I’m also considering Mind Rot as a sideboard option, which may at least
give us a chance to defeat mana-screwed opponents. Depending on how Mill decks evolve the
alternative anti-Mill strategy proposed by gwyned may be appropriate:
http://writeradept.blogspot.fr/2013/11/beating-dimir-mill.html
Azorius Control
This match is an absolute
headache. It is just difficult to keep
track of everything they can do.
Resolving Disciple of Phenax is important to get a look at their hand to
know when they have Celestial Flare, Essence Scatter, and perhaps most
importantly Last Breath. Deathtouch does
a good job of getting through Court Hussar, but Deputy of Acquittals and
Archaeomancer can accumulate card advantage quickly. I have a winning record against this deck,
but I don’t know if I should.
Evolution
Bad Touch is
far from settled in my mind. There are
many cards that I’m considering trying while exploring Golgari in Standard
Pauper. Without going into detail, here
are the possibilities that have piqued my interest:
Grisly Spectacle
Basilica Screecher
Sedge Scorpion
Baleful Eidolon
Trestle Troll
Terrus Wurm
Rubbleback Rhino
Commune with the Gods
Wildwood Rebirth
Shrivel
Drown in Filth
Cremate
Beckon Apparition
Mind Rot
I welcome anybody
to play this deck and let me know how they do with it! It leads to interesting and frequently close
games in which you press a minute advantage over many turns. Good luck to all of you Standard Pauper
Players and may all of your decks earn interesting names!
-Gamelen
Top 8 by 
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